Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Kissing away the grief



I have been in kiss overdrive these last few days. All I want to do is kiss Max and Sabrina, hold them, and hug them. Dave, too, but even more so the kids. It's been the most comforting thing to me.

Whenever I've gotten sad over the years about whatever, Dave has given me a hug and said, "Endorphin rush!" I know that physical contact has real mood-boosting powers; there's something so very soothing about that mush of Max and Sabrina's cheeks against mine (and they've both got plenty of cheek to go around). 

At night, during bedtime, Sabrina and I trade all kinds of kisses—lash kisses, nose kisses, ear kisses, hair kisses, vacuum cleaner kisses that make us giggle. Max has been a little stingy about doling out kisses lately, but if I keep asking eventually he'll plant one on me. Kisses are something Max had to learn how to do, and I never take them for granted. 

What lifts your mood when you're sad? 

Photo/istock

23 comments:

  1. I hope you and family are doing the best you can during this difficult time. You're all in my thoughts - R

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  2. Being around munchkins is, most definitely, the quickest way to cheer me up.

    *hugs*

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  3. I've only been a regular follower of your blog for a few weeks now, and I don't think I've ever left a comment, but I just wanted to tell you that I love you blog, and I can see why you have so many loyal followers. You have a great way of expressing yourself, and although your Max and my Avery have different challenges, I can relate to so many of the thoughts and feelings you express. I am so sorry about your father. I lost my grandfather a little over a month ago, and I thought I was ready because he'd been sick for a while and I knew it was coming, so I was surprised by the intensity of my sadness. I hugged and kissed and squeezed my children a lot too. It definitely helped me feel better, even though they were completely confused by my tears!

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  4. Hugs, kisses and ice cream are always helpful mood lifters in my neck of the woods.

    Keep doing what you're doing--and maybe have some ice cream, too!

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  5. It took Namine a while to learn how to kiss. For the longest time, she didn't pucker; she'd just press her lips to me. But no matter how she's done it, I always treasured her willingness to kiss - and how she loves to receive them!

    Doctors assured us, early on, that due to all the surgeries she needed, Namine would not like hugs, kisses, or pretty much any touching of any kind. Thankfully, that is not the case.

    The ability to love - and, by extension, to help each other get through the toughest times - is what we live for. As always, our prayers are with you and your family.

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  6. I'm an Auntie, and my 2 favorite nephews have magical powers! No matter what, they instantly put me in a good mood!

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  7. Oh, there is nothing better than hugs & kisses from little ones!

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  8. I have to second you on the kisses. Aidan is often left to take it for the team since he doesn't have the mobility to get away from me. Fortunately, he totally speaks my love language.

    Soak them up and let them bring you comfort!

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  9. hearing my kids laugh! its medicine for the soul. hugs to you again xxxx

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  10. Kisses and hugs from 12, I'm so fortunate she will give them and hugs and kisses from my older kids. I can't believe that at 18 and 16 they will still show this affection. There is nothing like it.

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  11. Kisses from Margo have defnitely helped me through this sad time. Juat looking at her also makes me feel better - seeing her sweet innocence and being reminded of the good things in life. I am also trying not to be too sad around her because I don't want her to pick up on anything, even though she is definitely way too young to understand what has happened.

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  12. When my daughter was born and we found out about her brain-damage, I was devastated. But, every time I held her, I felt better. I always wondered how a little baby could bring me such comfort. She still does.

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  13. Dear Ellen,

    To me kisses are magic, my kids all give lovely kisses, my CP kid, he my big smoocher, he has so much love to give, he'll give anyone who's upset a hug or kiss, he's so loving.

    So sorry to hear about your dad, that's so sad and our thoughts are with you.

    Love

    Mel
    xxx

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  14. hugs and kisses definitely help. and junk food.

    keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers, ellen. sending huge virtual HUGS!

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  15. Friends on DVD.
    Snuggling with either of my boys.
    A really good dinner that I don't have to cook (I'm an emotional eater, I admit it).

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  16. I always feel better when I'm with family and friends who have known me a really long time. People who don't care if I lose it. But nothing is better than when Moe looks me in the eyes and smiles. He can't say it, but I hear "I love you" every time.

    My thoughts are with you and your family.

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  17. I generally only have to talk to my 4 year old for about 10 minutes before I am guaranteed to laugh at something she says. That is one of the joys of parenthood I didn't really expect - the laughin every day. But it is definitely the kisses and hugs that give the most cheer. Hang in there, Ellen. We are thinking of you and yours.

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  18. It always cheers me up and gives me the sense of fulfillment whenever my older child says I love you! and my youngest child who is still a toddler knows also how to kiss me! Imagine that! - Alex

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  19. all of the above and .... singing.
    when I'm really cheesed off at work I belt out Tom Jones or Elvis and get an immediate endorphin rush.

    Ashley's a serial snogger too. once he starts he doesn't stop! lol

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  20. I found your blog through blogher, and I just love it. Your writing is expressive and just finds a way right into my heart. Thanks for sharing your journey!

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  21. Hugs are great. So is cheesecake.

    Thinking about you...

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  22. No one told me that the feel of my child's hand in mine would be the most thrilling feel in the world. When one of my kids slips his or her hand into mine, my troubles/stress/etc really does fall away.

    May your father's memory always be for a blessing.

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  23. My nephews make me happy when I'm sad. Hugs, kisses, playing, giggling...all of it! Children are the best gift from God whether they're your own or someone else's.

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Thanks for sharing!



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