Tonight I was driving on the highway, enjoying the ride. Dave is usually at the wheel on weekends, and mostly I'm home weekday nights with the kids, but every once in a while I'll slip out after they're asleep to do errands. There is something incredibly relaxing about cruising along in darkness lit up by the glow of headlights. Especially when you're alone and nobody's shouting "I'm thirrrrrrrrsty!" or "He's hitting me!" I get a lot of good thinking done, and some not-half-bad singing. Classic rock or '70s.
I started thinking back to when I learned how to drive, at 17. Back then, being on the road at night scared me. I was fine during the day and had even passed my road test the first time (despite the fact that I almost hit a pedestrian when I was backing into a parking spot, but the instructor had been writing notes and didn't see the guy leaping out of the way, which sure taught him to never again walk behind a car labeled DRIVING SCHOOL). When I was out at night and peering into the blackness, though, I found it hard to get my bearings. It felt out of control. It took me months to get used to seeing things.
It suddenly occurred to me how similar my journey has been with Max. In the early years, life felt the exact same way—scary, impossible to get my bearings, out of control. And then, I adjusted.
I'm sure as heck not on cruise control, but now I am able to see.
Do you know what I mean?
Photo/doctorious
Just have to remember to keep the petrol topped up!
ReplyDeleteI sure do know what you mean. And I don't think I'd ever want the cruise control on. For every fork in the road or hard turn that life or Liam (my 2 year old) throw at me it usually only serves to make me a better driver.
ReplyDeleteGreat post.
I know what you mean, I love your post, my fav bit was the pedestrian anecdote, my E.T plush toy was in the backseat footwell for good luck, and well mine was a she and she tumbled out on the emergency stop part of my test and the instructor who hadn't washed in a month+ said he should fail me for not buckling E.T up!
ReplyDeleteNo seriously, I do know what you mean and I too like late at night errands, I wonder how many special needs parents do that?
Great analogy! There is some light, but you have to watch carefully.
ReplyDeleteBarbara
That's an interesting way to think of it...
ReplyDeleteExcellent analogy. Things are getting clearer day by day.
ReplyDeleteMany days.... It's "Jesus, Take the Wheel!
ReplyDeleteIt does get easier. It's still HARD, but it's not as impossible and frightening as it seemed at the beginning.
ReplyDeleteLove the analogy.
Wow! What an inspiring and fun blog! And not just for moms who have kids with disabilities. Thanks for checking out our blog too! I'm glad you think it's helpful for parents too. :)
ReplyDeleteNice post.
ReplyDeleteI can say that BEING special needs is a lot like driving in the dark, too. My own thing is that I have nonverbal learning disabilities.
Love the analogy.
ReplyDeleteDriving in the dark never bothered me, but I have always hated driving in reverse. I'm sure we can apply that analogy as well :)
I get it. I never had to drive anywhere for years, except rarely. Now, I'm The Driver often, though my parents do help out plenty.
ReplyDeleteI drive in the dark a lot--I go to work/come home at crazy hours sometimes. I find it relaxing now, too, particularly when the radio works!
Great perspective and so well put. It's true that the early years are hardest!
ReplyDeleteDo I ever know what you mean. Was groping around in the dark for the first few years... I do feel like we've reached cruising altitude now though...
ReplyDelete