I was on the phone this weekend with my good friend, Paola; we studied together in Florence, Italy, when we were juniors in college. Paola's one of those people who always has the craziest stories. Her latest: Her two-year-old, Jeremy, refused to get dressed the other morning. So she drove him to preschool naked, she told me.
"You mean you put him in the car seat with just his diaper on?" I asked.
"No, Ellen. He was BUTT naked," she said. "When I showed up at the preschool, the teacher didn't even blink, it was like she sees naked kids coming to school all the time."
Desperate parenting. I have so been there, those times when you do whatever you have to do with your kids just to get by. I have changed Max in the trunk of our SUV in a parking lot. I have shoveled food into his mouth while standing in a car dealership's lot (it distracted him). My latest desperate parenting ploy involves Sabrina's preschool teachers, Marybeth and Louise. When Sabrina's having an on-the-floor meltdown, I'll say to her, "Sabrina, do you want me to tell Marybeth and Louise how you're acting?" And she'll stop throwing herself and sniffle, "Nooooooo." I saw Marybeth the other day, and 'fessed up. She laughed. She said it was OK to invoke her name, but also suggested I could say, "Now, how would Marybeth and Louise respond if you did that?" Me, I still prefer the outright threat.
What sort of desperate parenting measures have you guys resorted to lately?
Oh, and in case you're wondering what I've decided to do about the exercise thing, I'm looking into the running program Julia O'C suggested, Couch to 5K. Stay tuned! Maybe a few of us could do it all together? Maybe after Halloween?!
I blogged here about having to change my daughter's nappy on the nature strip outside her sister's preschool. That was pretty desperate!
ReplyDeletePreschool naked?!!? Wow! That is a mom who really has confidence to do what she's gotta do. It may sound crazy but I am in awe. I wonder if she ever had trouble getting him to get dressed again?
ReplyDeleteI'm with Marie....I don't know if I'd take a kid to preschool naked, either! In fact, I'm pretty sure that would never happen; I would be rearranging my schedule and to hell with the consequences!
ReplyDeleteHowever, I have taken the youngest to the doctor in one of my silky blouses, when that was the only way to get him out the door. Yes, I got a few looks from the other mothers in the waiting room (half of whom thought I was grandma--that's always good for your self esteem) because of his unusual attire, but screw them. If they knew he'd rather play beauty parlor than baseball, they'd probably give me even MORE looks, but screw them twice--I just don't care what they think!
You do what you have to do!
Let me go do some more voting! I do like to vote early and often!
Hey Ellen, I voted for you and as of 8:41 am, you had 56% of the vote! Congrats! I love the story. I don't have any good ones like that!
ReplyDeleteI think everything I do is an act of desperation. My kids freaking own me.
ReplyDeleteI took my daughter (almost 3) to preschool wearing a long sleeve shirt, underwear, and sandals. I threw tennis shoes, socks and pants in the car, despite the fact that she kept saying she didn't want pants and wanted to wear her "party shoes." The whole way there, I kept singing "Miranda needs some pants, and Miranda needs socks and shoes, before she goes to school." I sang it non-stop, the whole way to school--a twenty minute drive. Before long, she sang it with me and let me get her dressed at school. I felt like an idiot, but at least it worked.
ReplyDeleteLaura
I, too, use telling the preschool teachers about the at home attitude. I'm ashamed to say that works better than any other threats!
ReplyDeleteI have gone grocery shopping with the girls dressed in plastic heels princess costumes and feather boas....but I thought it was fun not really an act of desperation...down south they just call it eccentric and let it slide.
ReplyDeleteMy friend Kelli convinced her children that I had the personal phone number to Santa Claus (as in direct line cell phone) and threatened them with that for the last two years as the holiday season approaches. I just nod my head and back her up on it, Her girls believe it and it works for her.
Daniel was dragging his feet when going to therapy last week. It wasn't a hemi dragging, but rather of the "I'm being a stubborn kid and trying to get under Mom's skin" nature. He was having one of those days where if I say white, he says black. Anywhere, there were police everywhere, since there was a pretty serious investigation going on in the park adjacent to the hospital (a whole other long story). Daniel wanted to know why there were police walking all around the hospital, and I told him it was to make sure everyone tried their hardest in therapy and didn't misbehave. I felt only slightly guilty afterward, and it got him running!
ReplyDeleteAlas, it is only October and I'm already playing the Santa card. I have Daniel convinced that Santa is an old friend from college who also happens to be one of my Facebook friends, and all it will take is one message to get him banned from getting the coveted Rocky The Robot Truck this year.
I have way to many bad parenting stories to share in this small space. I did get my 30 Day Shred video in the mail today and now I will look into the running program as well. Perhaps we should start a slacker, mothers with special needs exercise encouragement blog?
ReplyDeletewow on a different note a saw a picture for Where the wild things are and the pic is of a boy with his head turned with a crown. It looked like max
ReplyDeleteI keep a Ring Pop in my purse for extreme measures. Elizabeth has so many medical appointments that are either a long wait to be seen or I need to talk (as a functioning adult) with the Dr. without Elizabeth growing horns. The ring pop can give me 5 minutes to talk and listen to her specialists.
ReplyDeleteThe ring pop can only be used if we are going home right away as the food colour and the sugar can mimic adrenelin and send her flying.
Just read your blog on 5 minutes for Special Needs about friends for Max. I know exactly what you mean! I have come to realize that Ben's bestest friends are the ones who he knows from school and camp. The playdates we have made have been wonderful experiences. I know the neighborhood kids love Ben, but from afar. They have a tough time understanding him and unfortunately when he does yell or pull their hair, or occasionally bite, it does scare them off.
ReplyDeleteI think finding a social network for our children is continuous work!
That's pretty hilarious story. My favourite part is the teacher's reaction to naked kid. I presume that he then got some clothes on? Or did he just calmly go into preschool naked?
ReplyDeleteYou know, Mary, I was laughing so hard at the story I forgot to ask about the clothes part! I am assuming, yes, my friend (or the teacher) then somehow got Jeremy dressed!
ReplyDelete